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Edward and Jacob's Happy Fun Day!

Prologue:

Edward Cullen, now happily married to Mary Sue  Bella Swan, was enjoying his daily morning cup of Bella's menstrual blood, when suddenly, Jacob appeared, a giant present in one hand, and 50 pounds of Cheeze-Its in another.

"Hi, Edward, I just dropped by coz' I have an idea! Let's have a Happy Fun Day! I watched How I Met Your Mother reruns the other night, you know, coz' I'm actually kinda more sane than you, and saw Robin and Patrice's BFF Fun Day. I just had an epiphany just then", Jacob blurted, a metrosexual tone in his voice.

Edward looked down to see a poster that says "Edward and Jacob's Happy Fun Day!", "umm.. I don't know, I was just about to abuse Bella, and she WAS about to pledge slavery to me, AGAIN"

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